Dissociation by Eli Oko

Why are they shouting?

Can you please ask them to quieten down

As the, tone gets louder

There is no place to escape now

They, lack self-control as I try to calm them down

It’s, time to let go – there is no escaping them now

 

Why are they shouting?

As if I can’t hear them at all

They, scream out instructions telling me what to do

They, don’t have my best interest

Each of them make decisions of their own

I’ve tried not to ingest and avoid for as long as I’ve known

But they keep on persisting, explain why they never let me free

I, don’t bother any of them but they, always bother me

If no one else hears them does that make me the only victim at risk?

If they cause me to act, will the judge convict me of it?

I’m, not planning to listen but their voices are becoming more harsh

They, often blur my vision and appear when all seems so dark

I, wake up in the morning and they, greet me first

I can’t separate my emotions for Him or from Her

I, have these hobbies, that I can’t enjoy

And these habits, I can’t curve

I often find myself trying to persuade them

To pray to my God that they won’t serve

In deep conversation, I express how I feel

But even with it all released I feel them with me still

In fact I, believe she, is the listening ear I try avoid

But in that moment a listening ear fills the void

I,  think I catch myself sometimes

Clearly happy in the state

Clearly, lost in the moment

Strangely, content and unfazed

 

I,  wish for it all to come to an end

An episodes finale to close the season

Or an excuse to tear them from the root

Making sanity the reason

I, need help to escape

I, think it’s time to let them, go

Because as they control bigger parts of me, it’s hard not to let them show

And when people ask if I am okay, I find it hard to let them know

 

There are parts of me that are foreign and I’ve watched them as they grow

Why are they shouting?

Can you please ask them to quieten down

Words in my head gets loud

There is no place to escape now

I, lack self-control, So these words in my head never calm down

If there is a way of escaping, tell me how.

 

 

Read Edward Honaker (21) story : http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3240571/Photographer-suffering-depression-captures-mental-illness-haunting-series-self-portraits-raise-awareness-disorder.html

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